Tag: Something

It’s been a while…

It’s funny. Sometimes I wonder where my voice is, and then other times…well..other times it simply seems like there’s too much to scream about. I may a big dork, but this is the stuff of which my brain begins its long long journey.

I still love writing. I’ll never stop really, however I just looked at the site…and I could have sworn I’d published at least a few things in the last few months.

But alas…such is not the case after all.

I managed to stop writing, and this is part of my voice…and incredibly important part. Because I am one of those people that already know…not suspect…I actually know how unforgiving and relentless the internet can be…but I need to vent. That same voice that my friends can hear by only seeing my expression for a couple seconds. That same emotive conscience that bolsters my courage to improve and grow and try and take everyone important to me along for the ride just seemed to take a vacation.

I cant really say that I made any big life changes. My business grew a bit, I’ve gotten busier. I’ve had some hard choices and experiences…but who doesn’t?

Somewhere in there, I re-prioritized my need to talk…to rant…hell…I haven’t even published any recipe’s in ages. So it begs the question…what am I expecting now? My opinions on the state of the human race in general certainly haven’t budged…I let that one ride on its own as a potential revisit of some “No More Stupid” posts.

I’ve found that I am enamored by the people that have the cajones to believe in something other that their own financial prosperity. I still seek that inspiration, and I still wake up every single morning and laugh at all the people that don’t consider it a blessing to be alive.

Maybe thats what it is.

Thus ends my incredibly useless stream of thought in trying to discern the real reason why I haven’t written anything…because we all know I certainly should be putting more *stuff* here. Feel free to complain or rant. I obviously need the activity 😉

Tony




TonyTown dot com soups on

A little grocery rant…

TonyTown dot com soups onThis has been bugging me since yesterday. Last evening I went grocery shopping. Now my grocery shopping is pretty static unless there is an ungodly good sale on something. I spent a whopping $44, and walked away with nearly 25lbs of fruits and veggies, and…wait for it…nearly 3 pounds of meat, which accounted for $15 of the bill.

Normally, I would prep about 1.5lbs of these groceries a day for meals & whatever….so yes…give or take a couple days, this is nearly two weeks of food for me. It’s just bothering me that meat is sooo frickin pricey, and this wasn’t even the premium stuff, it was just sausage (which is like the cheapest meat you could ever buy). Maybe at some point I’ll take the drive out to one of the local suppliers and arrange a walkthrough to document the process.

We all know I am a far cry from a vegetarian. But I am pretty picky about my meats. I don’t like processed anything, and sausage is about the only “processed” anything I get nowadays, and thats only because I don’t have the room to make and store my own sausage (it isn’t hard or messy, just not feasible without significant cold storage).

So my question is…why is a meat product that probably costs less than $.50 to produce sold at $5.00 per pound?!

*ugh*




This is just another day in my life…

Picture a small suburbian corner store.

Most of the people living in and around the area may not know each other, but we’ve seen each other before. We say hi or at least nod to each other in passing. It’s a pretty friendly day. I have an incredible addiction to TruMoo that draws me to the corner store almost daily.

As I approach the entrance, another patron approaches the same door and I open it for her. She seems surprised and looks at me like I just did something unheard of. I say, “After you.” I go and grab my Trumoo and as it happens end up in line behind that same woman.

As we’re in line we both seem to be cutting joke with the staff there (this is a regular thing) and the woman seems incredibly familiar, or maybe it’s the other voice yelling inside my head “GET HER NUMBER YOU MORON!” …there’s no doubt – she’s cute, outgoing and I place her at around 30(ish).

Still **something** stops me…it was totally subconscious. No rings, no ring marks, no indications that she’s an axe murderer…so why am I not engaging the conversation?!

She gets through with her purchases and the internal conflict in my subconscious is totally becoming audible to me.

I get through with my purchases just as she reaches the door and I am STILL not pulling the trigger. This simply isn’t me. I may not always make a move or engage someone that is interested, but it’s always a pretty conscious choice…yet still here I am and I can already tell. I’m not going to talk to her.

It turns into slow motion. She’s stopped at her car and is just leaning against it now smiling. I smile at her, she smiles back…

…and I get into my car and start driving away.

Yup. Not only did I not take advantage of the chance…I am getting the distinct impression I just totally choked…and THAT is not how it works in TonyTown. I may be a big dork, but striking up conversation isn’t usually a problem.

…I drive about ten feet forward. What the hell?! Am I turning into THAT guy?! The one that can’t approach someone on a dime? It’s not like I’m Don Juan or anything, but approaching and talking…lol…I’ve been doing that since I was born! She had a great personality and I am obviously interested…why not ask?!

At this point my brain does its thing and I manage to rummage through a gazillion years of memories to find the few that my subconscious had access to that apparently weren’t connecting with me.

That attractive and compelling woman and I had met before…and now I know why I was holding back. She was an ex of one of my oldest friends and undeniably one of the centerpoints of absolute psychotic behavior I and a number of my friends had ever encountered. She was the center of a number of trashed friendships and for a couple of those friends the crux of trashed relationships.

Now it was clear. Man…it’d been 10 maybe 15 years…I honestly don’t know if she’s still the same person. I just remember the windfall of crazy shit that happened to me at her hands.

I stopped the car for a sec and looked back her direction. Yup…there she was.

I move on and remember that my brain is incredibly functional and will sometimes look out for me even when I might be thinking about (or with) something else.

Yep. Just another day. 😉

-Tony