Tag: Hell

Sometimes death likes to dance…

So as it happens, I suppose for a while there I got a respite. But Ol’ Grim…he’s never far away…

The problem with loving so many people is the pain felt in losing them. You might hear about my numerous encounters with Ol’ Grim (click here for the renditions, aka Dancing with Death). Unfortunately, as with everyone, if you live long enough and meet enough people, you inevitably get to meet him. Ol’ Grim came to visit tonight, but he didn’t stop for conversation, he just left me a note.

“The docs are giving me 2 years.”

Trust me, even if you hate my guts and wouldn’t waste the dung off your heel on my grave and you’re reading this solely so that you can justify hating reading this even more, you don’t want to ever hear this…

For me it wasn’t the first time. As I mentioned above, the awesome part in meeting so many people is in enjoying having them around and knowing that you’re looking forward to spending more quality time with them at some point in the future.

“The docs are giving me 2 years.”

Don’t get me wrong, my candor might be light, but if you know me, this is like pressing the BAD button for me. I don’t expect it’s much different for anyone else, but since this is my little patch of the internet, I am going to ignore anyone is actually reading this and just vent a bit. I’ve seen more friends pass than most soldiers have to see in battle. I’ve held the hand of the dying so many times it’s become a damn blur. Up until now, I’ve learned that this part of the experience is the same, but it’s also taught me that how people deal with it progressively is an entirely different matter.

I’ve learned how to keep from freaking out. I’ve learned that acceptance is everything and it takes fucking time, but it NEVER (and believe it or not I feel very lucky for this) diminishes the pain.

Today, I am going to spend the day with an old friend, and ignore the hell out of everyone else. Because for once I get to have fun and make the best of it before that day comes instead of regretting the days I missed.

Ciao.

-T




Entertaining myself.

No really…I am just finding humor in sooo many things 😉 …and of course, I find it necessary to will some people to stop existing. It’s ME people. 😉

It’s been an incredibly rough day.

Some of the cons of having this blog are the rules I made from the very beginning.
See, I have a ton of close friends that are completely uninterested in blogging. Even more importantly, most of my friends are more than adverse to the idea that I might actually write about them here. I knew this going in, and promised myself that if I didn’t have anything interesting to write I sure as hell wouldn’t drag them in, and unlike California1, I respect people’s privacy.

Ergo, I don’t bring my friends lives into the blog. Lately this has been incredibly difficult.

No details, I just wish I had the will to make someone cease to exist. I know, we all wish we had that power, but if I gave you details, you would soooo be telling me to do it. 😉

Work has picked up, which is to say I don’t have time to do anything else but whatever the hell it is I do for a living.

Anyhow, I get to sleep in (comparatively) tomorrow so here I am kicking back and relaxing a bit before medicating heavily and getting a full 8 hours of sleep for the first time in almost a week.

I did mention I am netertaining2(I meant to spell it that way too) myself right?
Well, I just couldn’t stop watching this for about ten minutes.
His name is George Watsky(@gwatsky) and man he’s awesome to listen to 😉
Rapid-Fire-Monologue. This guy’s amazing.

So netertainment it is, with a nice big glass of Grand Marnier to relax a bit of the evening away.

Have a great evening everyone, and if you have the mojo to spare. Send it over my way and by way of me to a dear friend in need of a LOT of badass luck.

-Tony

Show 2 footnotes

  1. California is stupid, don’t argue, just smile and nod because aside from the nice weather, I have about a million very legitimate reasons to never like that state
  2. Netertaining (or Netertainment) is my word(s) for entertaining myself via the interwebs.



A thought on the Gulf.

I had this dream this morning…it was awesome. A murder mystery that was so deep and involved that it took everyone from CSI, Eleventh Hour, and Supernatural to stop the killer.

And it occurred to me. What the hell are all the other oil companies doing to help? Are they helping to dig these relief wells? Wouldn’t they be able to help with manpower?

There are so many people out of work right now that the oil companies are putting political pressure on lifting the moratorium before revisions to drilling safety policies are met out. In essence this would allow everyone to act as if NOTHING had ever happened. This little rant isn’t about who’s fault this is. Everyone laying this at the feet of the government needs to stop. This was caused by a company that has a proven track record for flat-out ignoring safety policies on drilling rigs. They cut corners and this is what they got for it…a woefully tragic event that will likely be killing most of the sea life in the gulf and beyond for years…not months.

Back to manpower. So…BP says the relief well is still more than a month out…but what if other oil companies are helping? I mean, Exxon probably want to get back to business right? the UAE has already offered their top people to come and help. Also, I cant help but think that the effort put forth could use some serious brainpower and manpower from ALL the oil companies, I mean…since BP is already footing the bill right? You want them to get on the ball? When they are having to pay their competitors to come in and help, I think maybe this would encourage some serious ass-kicking…anyone?

…anyhow that’s a thought and it just popped in my head and I wanted to voice it.

-T