Monthly archives: January, 2009

A Mountain of Unsung Hope

It isn’t about polarities. I think it’s more so a rendition – a snapshot of the world. We all wonder at the complexity, yet cry out from our hearts in empathy for problems most of us will never experience directly. A thin strand of hope that all people hold tightly that same foundation we find in ourselves granting the strength to live…to love…to hope.

I have dreams. Not the singular easy dreams, unfortunately my life…my experiences have not granted me the blessing of a narrow point of view. I wonder at the miracle of it all, and am held in thrall of the details. A butterfly effect of thought…seeing an idea through to exodus, if only in my mind. Years spent questioning everything. Not just what I see, but laying said inquiries before a moral gauntlet and an inquisition comparing ethics. Any one person more than an epic, a song to the hearts of all who know them. I’ve spent so much time watching that I’ve rendered myself albeit incapable of experience. Emotion isn’t hard for me, communication and trust are my Achilles’ Heel.

While not above hope and inspiration, of late I’ve spent my day learning about my friends. Loves…hates…heroes and villains. I’ve watched strangers and unknowns in comparison. It’s not far away to state that we’re all just spending our time hoping that we’re not alone.

When played out, these future epics leave me satisfied in hope. Not that I could ever walk away and be confident in the future, but confident in the future that includes me. We’re human, the good, the bad, the ugly. I find myself enamored that what I find in myself as a flaw, or weakness will never yield or become a hindrance in what little inspiration I hope to demonstrate, explain, and impress on those around me.

Rather than place a mountain of unsung hope in the words of a little blog such as mine, in time I intend to give an example, a thought, or consideration to a few people that could do well to impart the same on a few others, in example or word…thus moving forward.

It is for all to complete the Great Work. Each their part, each their role. A “Great Work”…I haven’t used that phrase in a very long time….to sit in thrall of a plan so meager as to allow many to improve the world, make a better place for all of us. This isn’t so big a task on paper, or in a blog…but to take that Work and make a reality of it…death comes light as a feather…duty heavier than a mountain. It is so refreshing to find wisdom in the imagination of those who’ve left us.

Back on track. Not that the idea came from a book or the ramblings of someone long gone, but having the deplorable habit of thinking through to exodus possible relationships, friendships, and most importantly those romanticisms that should by all means fortify me in hope…I find myself standing at a crossroad…struggling…wondering what it is exactly I should try to impress, upon myself just as much as on others.

Weird eh?

-T




Crossing the Bar

Recently some dear friends lost their father, and I had the privilege of meeting him once, stoic, wise, and truly gifted in his wife and children. While I haven’t been in touch with them during the services, I still notice a morbid calm even here. This isn’t the first time I’ve quoted Tennyson, will hardly be the last, and I look forward to referencing him many many times in between. I’ve never really liked anyone seeing me mourn, there is a time and a place for it always, but the truth remains I don’t deal with it very well at all, and force myself to celebrate instead. Years of practice…years of practice…anyhow…how’s that for the first decent post in like a month eh? Oh…and READ THE DAMN POEM!!

Crossing the Bar
By Alfred, Lord Tennyson

Sunset and evening star,
And one clear call for me!
And may there be no moaning of the bar,
When I put out to sea,

But such a tide as moving seems asleep,
Too fall for sound and foam,
When that which drew from out the boundless deep
Turns again home

Twilight and evening bell,
And after that the dark!
And may there be no sadness of farewell,
When I embark;

For tho’ from out our bourne of Time and Place
The flood may bear me far,
I hope to see my Pilot face to face,
When I have crost the bar.